Maybe Matilda: Confessions

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Confessions

I'm sure this makes me a creative misfit, but the truth is . . . 

I'm getting tired of chevron. And burlap. And excessive ruffles. And headbands worn straight across the forehead. And especially chalkboard paint used on anything and everything. (Edited! Thanks to Toni for reminding me that I'm also so over mustaches and the various Keep Calm & Make A Stupid Poster prints.)

I get embarrassed when I find out someone I know in real life reads this blog. It makes me feel a little ridiculous.

I might be the absolute worst teacher of sewing and crochet there ever was. I think everyone I've ever tried to teach has sworn they'll never attempt it again.

It takes like 200 shots of me modeling something I've made to get the two or three decent pictures that make it to the blog. (You thought Forrest's outtakes were goofy? They're frameworthy compared to some of mine.) And usually, in the two or three decent shots, I'm looking away from the camera. Boy howdy, I sure end up with some doozies.

I've never been to Anthropologie, and I feel somewhat annoyed by how much I'm supposed to love it.

#1 way to get me to unfollow your blog? Write about how amazing your husband is. Really, try it.

Anything you'd like to confess?

While you're here . . . my knotted crochet headband tutorial is over on Artsee Bloggers today (a really fun new creative blog directory)--go check it out!

76 comments :

  1. I made your knotted headband last week! And it is the first thing I've ever crocheted other than a straight across afghan tied off on every row. So, to prove your 3rd confession incorrect, it turned out great! You are an excellent long-distant teacher of crochet! :)

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  2. I thought I was the only one that is over chevron!! So excited to be a misfit along with you!

    Kristi

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  3. You are hilarious...your test as a teacher will come if I can crochet the headband! So far nothing has worked yet! Thanks for letting me feature your tutorial today.

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  4. I agree with the first one - chevron everywhere, burlap over done & I never understood the hairband trend!

    Aw I guess if you read (or followed) my blog you don't anymore since I wrote a post (sorta) like that not too long ago.. LOL

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  5. Over chevrons (check) Over burlp (check) heck I have been to anthropologie and that store makes me want to scream.... Their prices are stupid! Confession: I don't like it when a blog is all perfect crafts and photoshopped pictures... Give me real baby!

    Thanks for keeping it real!

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  6. I've never been into chevron. never been to anthropologie. am also embarrassed about real life friends reading my blog. I really hate pricing my work and that's why I'm scared to sell stoofs. I'm not sure if I even have mentioned my husband on my blog. I don't eat out because of my severe dairy allergy and I'm terrified of hidden dairy being in foods and getting sick - so I take a PB&J sandwich with me when I go out.

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  7. I burst into giggles when I read this post. I was just talking to another blogger last week about how we are so over chevron, mustaches, Keep calm & ...prints, rosette tutorials, and burlap! You definitely aren't the only one who is ready for something new. lol
    And if I ever have a "amazing" husband post, everyone should assume that hubby has hijacked my blog and started posting!

    - I don't bother trying to take pics of myself
    - I don't understand about Anthro either
    - what is the big deal w/ Pottery Barn?
    - why do people keep making pillowcase dress tutorials?

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  8. I'm over the completely white rooms with shades of white and then more shades of cream worked in. Cripes. Do people really LIVE in those houses? If they do, they must not have husbands or children or pets... or ever have spaghetti for dinner... or put their feet up on the couch after a long day.

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  9. Oh, Rachel...just another reason I love you...oh, and my husband...I love him, too...;)(joking! DON'T stop following me...I know the state you live in...may take a while to actually find you in that state, but...;))

    Over Chevron, over burlap, but I gotta tell ya, I still like ruffles...I'm afraid I always will...are headbands straight across the forehead "in"? Yikes...

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  10. OH! And I take about 100 photos per post before I find ones that don't have random childrens' hands, feet, toys or dust in...;)

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  11. I like your confessions :) The amazing husband confession made me laugh.

    Confessions of my own... I thought it was really tacky that someone pinned a recipe of mine and put it under their board titled "This is why you are fat". Yes, someone is actually using Pinterest to make a board of things they hate, and to judge people. THAT really annoyed me.

    I think my other confessions would sound petty, so I'll keep those to myself. haha. :)

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  12. LOL...cute post. Heading over now to see your tute.

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  13. I've never used burlap or worn a headband straight across my forehead (except when I totally rocked my elementary talent show with my dance routine to "Beat It").

    And as for chalkboard paint it has ALWAYS been a mystery to me---does anybody understand what a mess that will actually make and how crappy it will look after the first time it has been erased? (Maybe I just taught public school way too long.)

    HOWEVER---I will never be over the mustache thing as long as my sister in law keeps making them into dark chocolate suckers. (It's chocolate on a stick! How could I EVER get over that?)

    ps---I've never been to Anthropolgie either and um...some one gave me a keep calm thing which got kindly donated to the local thrift store...

    Ps---I have PLENTY of bloggity confessions I'd like to make but I'll save those for a later time. Seeing as how the list is long and specific and just plain mean.

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  14. Confession: I just watched "Red Riding Hood" whilst I folded my laundry. Don't judge. I was curious. Also It's lame!

    On a side note: It's dorky to follow trends just for the sake of being super cool. I say, wear what you love, do what you love (within reason of course), and be who you really are. Too preachy? Sorry babe! Love your post!! (chevron's sooo over!)

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  15. Love it and I totally agree lets see I think I might have an even longer list of things I am over. Anddd unfortunately half of them I have probably done on my blog already. I swear my tastes changes every other day.... AND I thought I was the only one who didn't like to tell "real life" people about my blog----! You are just great. I love it!

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  16. OH MY! Rachel How do I love thee.... You totally made me smile!
    If you ever have a baby girl you will so be making a ruffle butt onesie.....

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  17. My blog is a forum for moaning about my husband disguised as craft blog. I only say the occaisional nice thing about him as he reads it and I want him to carry on bringing me a cup of tea in the mornings!

    xxx

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  18. Can't even tell you how much I love this! Please add to the above list - wreaths!!!

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  19. oh my goodness your too funny! but really my hubby is the best and i was gonna blog about him, but i better not. cuz i might loose a follower and that would be the worst. i blog just to see how many followers i can get...HA!!

    totally unrelated, i had someone email me the other day wondering if i was going to start doing more tutorials again and less garden/kid posts, because they were going to stop following me...seriously?...buh-bye!! who does that?

    im done ranting...thanks:)

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  20. I confess that I have written an "amazing husband post" but it was on Father's Day, so I hope that doesn't count :)

    On another note, I did score some free burlap recently from a coffee shop and I'll be decorating my craft room with it because hey, it was free and I'm all about free. Hopefully you won't shun me ;)

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  21. I hate chevron, and I've always hated chevron.

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  22. LOVE IT! COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF.

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  23. I think I could confess just about all of these :) I also have to say, I can't stand Christmas in July posts. I'm so sick of reading Christmas project posts in December, and I really don't want to see them in July.

    I understand where trends come from, but I think a lot of ladies fall in love with something just because the big bloggers do it. It would be nice to see more people confident enough in their own style to just do what they want to do and love it for being them.

    I'm tired of reading that colored furniture and anything but white/gray walls are so out. Blogs are a great way to connect and inspire creativity, but they're also a great way to make women discontented with what they have. I love my husband, may have mentioned once that he's awesome, but he's also real and human with big flaws. He's not the perfect guy many women describe their husbands are, and sometimes I have a hard time believing some ladies' men are as perfect as they make them out to be.

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  24. Oh, I just love how real you are. I have always hated chevron...just needed to get that off my chest.

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  25. This post seriously made me laugh.

    I think the problem with the Internet is that people try too hard to be creative. They have to make "blogworthy" things. I don't have much "pizazz" on my blog because I enjoy creating things that I could actually use and like. I don't need to ruffle my Crock Pot. Just putting a rosette or ruffle on something doesn't trip my trigger.

    But, chalkboards? I really like chalkboards. And did I mention that my husband is amazing? ;) Cause he really is.

    XOXO and lots of ruffles and burlap,
    Kim

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  26. Thanks for the lunch break laugh. :)

    Confession: I had to google Chevron. I also take 80 pictures of myself to get a few good ones (and I whiten my teeth and remove my zits digitally before posting them). I intend on writing a confession post at some point solely because I enjoyed yours so much. My husband is amazing...sometimes. The rest of the time he's kind of like another child. ;)

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  27. Haha your post made me laugh. I only started blogging in January but can totally relate! I don't like chevrons, headbands across head (50's flapper is not a look I want to go for!) and as for burlap I have no idea what it even is and had never heard of anthropologie (sp?) before I started reading blogs(I am in the UK)...! As for photos of me, basically none on my blog, I look awful in almost all photos! I did write a post last week that did mentioned hubby but it was our anniversary! I have a few others I could add to the list but I should prob stop now!!

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  28. Oh my gosh... this is my all time favourite blog post EVER!! Your honesty is so refreshing! I'm with you on every single one of these points... except that I simply don't try taking pictures of myself modelling things. Thank you for a long hard laugh after a long day of work =) x

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  29. Chevron is so not for me either I never liked it! I also HATE Houndstooth! BLEH! HA! This post cracks me up! Glad you still follow me even though I am into a few trends you dont like. xoxo

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  30. Oh my gosh that just got a HUGE GUFFAW from me!!! I HEAR YOU SISTER!!! I just had a little rant not long ago on these very things: http://pleasedaspunch-rh.blogspot.com/2011/06/trends-to-rant-about.html

    Chevrons. Uh, yeah. It's a Charlie Brown stripe, get over it. And don't get me started on AnthropologIE (oh how cute, they spelled it with an "ie." I wonder how many people think that's the real spelling of the word now?) I do not want to wear clothing that I'll ruin if I try to de-wrinkle it in any way.

    If I can add one to the list, as much as I really do enjoy crafting with Mod Podge...seriously. How many things can really be successfully Mod Podged? I'm just waiting for the day someone goes over the edge and Mod Podges their own kid.

    Oh also? Can we move on from using painters' dropcloth as fabric?

    Whew. Glad to get that off my chest. Thank you!!! ;)

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  31. lol.. wow, I feel totally out of place here. Love it all ESP my hubby!

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  32. Sweet honesty! Thanks for saying so many things I have been thinking! :) going to make the doily tee as soon as I recover from being away from home for 2 weeks.

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  33. P.S. I haven't tried sewing or crochet since I started reading your blog but it can't be that bad! :)

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  34. Never understood the chevron, burlap, or pottery barn. And the headband thing? The only thing it reminds me of is dressing up as an Indian as a child, so yeah. I don't do that either! :)

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  35. when i get home i am going to make make my wonderfully, amazing husband wear a burlap headband right over his big fat forehead - while wearing a chevron shirt standing by my keep calm poster. and i am just going to stare at the awesomeness of it all. KIDDING! i have always liked anthropologie though... because we don't have one where i am from! but now that i think about it... i really like the old anthropologie - as in early 2000s. this new stuff is sort of crappy. i haven't seen a cute cardi in there in forever. so i guess i am over that too. and if you want to make fun of me... go ahead... because i put a pillowcase dress on my bloggers today... but its smocked. and i have tried smocking before and it turned out crappy. and i finally found good elastic thread to use. haha. love your blog. youre funny!

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  36. YOU, I LOVE! This blog was just what I needed! You vented my inner frustrations (except, I apologize I do love me some hippie headbands, but I also love Rainbow Brite and Jem so I don't really think I'm looked to for fashion savvy). I'm over blogs that show no sign of realness (you know, great at parenting,the best in wifely-hood, every craft project and home repair jobs are a cinch for them and they really try to convince you of how easy it is, then when I read the directions and go cross-eyed after step 12 ...or more honestly step 4, I feel like an idiot for not getting it!! Whew...that felt nice!

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  37. I seriously chuckled. I never cared for chevrons, or anthro. And I thankfully missed the headband trend. I would like to second Jenny Joy and say that no REAL person lives in a white house with white furniture and white decorations. Unless they are an ice queen.

    Thank you for this post. Someone needed to say it.

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  38. I totally agree with you on having someone I know quote something to me from my blog....or when I am in the middle of telling someone a story and then interrupt me to say that they already read about it on my blog! I do think my husband is awesome - but try to keep it real on my blog - real enough that people "get" it - but not so real as to tick him off that I am sharing our "stuff" on-line! ;)

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  39. I never understood the whole chevron thing, don't do ruffles and have no use for chalkboard paint unless is making chalkboards for my little ones. We don't have Anthro here in the north of England and it would take more than a poster to make me calm!
    Oh...and my husband can be a right royal PITA!

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  40. Oh goodness. I love this post. Everything about it.

    I get REALLY weirded out when "real life" people tell me they read my blog. It creeps me out...and then I feel like I should censor myself..and then I mention killing raccoons and farting....

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  41. Ha! I have always hated chevrons. They make me think of something from a thrift store and not in a good way. In a "something a distant great aunt found and just knew you would love while rummaging through a thrift store" kind of way. Oh and I rarely post pictures of me on my blog because most of the time I run around in a rosette-free, embellishment-free T-shirt with my hair tied up in some sort of knot and it's just too much of a pain to craft/sew/cook something and get gussied up too. I love your blog and thanks for the hilarious, very true post.

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  42. (ahem)...i like chevrons.....but BEFORE everyone else did.....

    my grandma had some wicked awesome yellow and lime green chevron sheets in the 80's (which I am sure were from the 70's)and I LOVED those sheets. they were so soft.

    sorry. (can we still be friends?) :)

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  43. haha! totally agree. Burlap is not a curtain/lampshade/everything fabric! i don't have the nerve to post things like this...but I'm sick of knock-offs. I don't think anyone will agree though!

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  44. Well, I guess I'll stop working on that chevron patterned burlap ruffled headband I was making you for your birthday....

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  45. This cracks me up. I could add pennants to this list.

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  46. Stay original, Girl!!! I'm sorry, I can't agree with everything you said, what's so bad about amazing husbands?

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  47. i just had to come back and tell you how i am so over all of those paint chip card crafts!! i saw another one today in BHG while waiting in the doctors office. and am i the only one that finds it weird that people are stealing these for crafts and not using them for what they were intended for? it just seems weird and so wrong to me.

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  48. Can I just say, this is one of the best posts I have read in a long time! I have just started my blog,I think I have made 4 posts & NO followers:(
    Anyway, I love colored furniture, have ALWAYS hated headbands,and you will NEVER see a post on my blog about my wonderfully, amazing husband, cuz he's not too much of that. I try not to ask him for too much help when I am doing projects, cuz when I do, he acts alot like one of the kids and kind of stomps and pouts.
    I am still learning and I don't know what Anthropologie is, so I don't know if I "love"it or not. And as for the mustache thing, I have to agree with Liz Evans, as long as her
    sister-in-law keeps making them into chocolate suckers, I will like them.
    Thanks for the "confessions". I plan on being a follower her for a while.
    www.shaneylouscountrylane.blogspot.com

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  49. Bahaha! I absolutely LOVE this post! It should be called "Keepin' it Real with Rachel".

    Seriously, what's up with all this chalk stuff? Guh, I hate chalk. When I was teaching I refused to use the chalk board, and the night janitor loved me for it.

    I get so annoyed when bloggers gush about their husbands in their "about me" section (he washes the dishes, mows the lawn, AND vacuums). Uh, clearly you love your husband and he's fantastic because you're still married to him, but refrain from rubbing it in the faces of us who have non-vacuuming spouses.

    I'm over all these "Hollywood Hair" and "Luscious Curls Overnight" posts. You wrap your damp hair in a sock and sleep on it. Done.

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  50. I think you're a splendid teacher!! Learning to crochet was infinitely easier with your helpful hints and fabulous patterns.. which I need to buy more of.. :)

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  51. You are sooo funny! I agree with most of the stuff you complained about, especially little girl costume dresses with ALL those ruffles. Really how are those poor little girls suppose to play in those clothes? Sometime I think all they did was just wrap the poor little thing in a bolt of fabric. But I must say, I still love your blog. Keep it real.

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  52. Aww, pretty sure I love a few things you hate, but hope we can still be buds. :) I do love my hubs an awful lot, but don't think I've dedicated a post to him...(have I?) Hmm, seeing as how I don't remember, probably safe. I will agree that I don't ge the headband across your forehead thing. I wear a headband to keep hair out of my eyes, not put the hair in them.

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  53. i liked chevrons when i mistakenly thought they were called "zig zags." can we add bunting and pallet projects too? and subway art? and silouhette projects? i'm over all these things. i was just telling someone that it also bugs me when a craft blogger says that he/she has BIG NEWS and it's that they're moving.

    hmm, i don't really care about that. and i don't care about the husbands, and not really about the kids either. unless it's to explain why there aren't new projects/tutorials/ideas/or a part of the blog (and that's why i read it) it drives me nuts. i'm not a meanie, i just read those blogs with a purpose in mind. in fact, any post that begins with "i'm going to brag/be mushy/whine/update you on the innerworkings of my life..." i tune out. i can't be the only one who does this! i'm not a bad person, i swear!!

    and just to be fair, i do read a fair amount of blogs that are just musings about life. i love those, but not when i want to get my craft on.

    okay, i may be a tiny bit of a meanie... :/

    and i'm only anonymous because my computer keeps logging me out of blogger. you can catch me at kamirules.blogspot.com. you know, if you want to call me mean and insensitive. :D

    ps. LOVE the knotted headband. i have given a few as gifts and it's always a hit.

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  54. Yes I'm tired of white everything when it comes to decorating. And honestly I'm getting sort of tired of burlap on everything. Another fabric that is IMPOSSIBLE to clean. How can anyone with kids possible live in an all white house! I made some white slipcovers a few years ago and what a headache they are to keep clean. Ovaltine stains just don't blend in on white slipcovers, I'll tell you!

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  55. OMG I love this. I love this so much.

    Megan
    www.CutTheCraft.com

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  56. "Keep Calm & Make a Stupid Poster" - completely agree!

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  57. I'm totally going to make a you a chevron, burlap headband & send it your way. :)

    Too much of something is never good. That is where the above mentioned items are headed. :)

    Ps--LOVE your writing style!

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  58. You are too funny. Love this candid post. I say love what you love, even if it's not cool in the blogosphere. Keep on keepin on!

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  59. Now I know we can be friends... for reals... I bow down to thee.... this is my favorite post EVER! ;-)

    ummm burlap... not a fan... the most uncomfortable, itchy, unattractive material known to mankind ... I never got that trend?

    :-)

    Nicky

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  60. Fun confessions! I'm the opposite of you though - I unfollow when people complain about their partners!

    I confess that I am sick of owls. And I agree about Anthropologie.

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  61. I don't know how I missed this post..but can I just copy and paste everything in it as my own confession, too? lol

    Love yer guts!!

    ~ Sarah

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  62. Ha! This is great. Well, I still enjoy a good ruffle, can take or leave the burlap thing, and personally, I think chevron is on its way out before most folks know its in. And Anthro.... never been there. I never claimed to be cool.

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  63. Best blog I've read in weeks! I didn't know it was a "Chevron" until it became popular... I always called it a zigzag. Or "Charlie Brown Sweater" print. Certainly nothing to get excited about. And what's the deal with pennant bunting? That's another one that I didn't know the term for OR can't see what's so great about it. Where in the world do you hang it - besides a kids' party?

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  64. My #1 confession right now?
    Just remodeled my blog with...wait for it....chevron. Oops, sorry!
    I'll work on that!
    Other than that, i've got my moments. Maybe i'll post them up.

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  65. LOL. I agree with you... on most points!
    I do like the ruffles. But I always have. And I guess you would unfollow me three times a year... Chris' bday, Fathers Day, and ... well, maybe our anniversary. Sometimes. I can't remember if I did one last year when he forgot our anniversary... AND my birthday... within two months of each other... while I was heavily pregnant... and he said I looked fat... and was off hunting... Nope, not always a fan! LOL.

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  66. Oh and I am TOTALLY with two hooligans on the paint chip project thing, it makes me really uncomfortable! I bought some earrings on etsy and they came on paint chip cards as earrning holders and I never ordered from them again... They're provided for free so people can use them to pick out paint, I highly doubt the paint companies intended people to use them to sell their earrings on. And this seller was using the paint color names as the names for the earrings, so it wasn't exactly a one-time go. I just couldn't order from her again, no matter how cute the earrings were... it's a grey area, I guess, but I'm not cool with picking up paint chip cards for anything other than picking paint colors.

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  67. (I'm not cool with ME doing it... I wouldn't chase anyone down with pitchforks and torches over it, either.)

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  68. I couldn't agree more with you on everything! Loved this post

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  69. I LOVED this post! I love your blog and how real and down-to-earth you are. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

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  70. I LOVE this! Seriously, I might not agree about chevron (sorry... maybe it's just one of the only patterns that I can use a stencil to paint and it doesn't look like a second grader went abstract), but I'm SOOOO there on just about everything else. I get really embarrassed about real life people knowing about the blog and the sappy hubby columns... really? REALLY? (Somehow, I always picture the "Really?! with Seth and Amy" from SNL with these posts... reading a line, saying Really?!, etc.) Anyways, LOVE your honesty!

    -Mel the Crafty Scientist

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  71. LOVE THIS! And love that so many bloggers agree! I admit to putting gratuitous photos of my puppy on blog a couple times (he has nothing to do with my blog but I do a "Wordless Wednesday" post, and with him, you really don't need words). There is so much to be said for creating your own style, not following trends. I started an interior design/architecture blog mainly because I wanted to write about my interests, and start a discussion on how we should define "timeless" design. How long will burlap and French antiques and preppy chevron prints be timeless? Obviously, there are a whole lot of us who probably didn't like them in the first place! (Plus, I have no desire to show anyone for the hundredth time how to paint a dresser from the thrift store.)
    Would love for you to join the conversation on my blog! www.amaranthineaesthetic.wordpress.com

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  72. This is a great post!
    I don't mind the occasional personal post on a blog. But constant gushing (or complaining) is a turn off.

    I've never been into ruffles and burlap, but I am guilty of loving a good chalkboard (but as an actual chalkboard... not chalk paint on other random stuff). I also don't 'get' huge headbands and mustaches. And I've been to Anthropologie: you are not missing much.
    And while I do love and appreciate a good knock-off...not everything in the PB and Ballard catalog needs to be copied. I want to see more original ideas from folks.

    Trends come and go. I've learned that it's important not to 'blog on the trend bandwagon'. You have to know yourself and what you like. If you stick to that and blog about what you love, like minded readers will follow!

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  73. ...I have no idea what chevron is :D hahahhhahaa and am barely familiar with the other things you mentioned!

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  74. I absolutely love this post... and might steal the idea!

    I honestly don't know what chevron is... I am still new to the crafting world. I don't really like ruffles (they've never been my thing) and don't like handbands unless they can hold my pain in the butt hair back from my face.... so I don't wear them that much. Chalkboard paint.. people still use that??
    I'm embarrassed to know that two of my best friends read my blog, although they only have nice things to say.
    I take about a million pictures a day before I can even find one single decent one... and I want to be a professional photographer.... I need lots of work on that one. Haha.
    I've never heard of Anthropologie before reading this.. and since I've read this I don't know that I want to visit it. Something about it being overpriced?

    I love this idea. :)

    <3 Jenn
    jenn-mcclure.blogspot.com

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  75. I agree for the most part, but reserve the right to differ about the headbands. I actually just started wearing them, across the forehead as you probably wouldn't like. Only I have a reason, all the dang hair falling out along my hairline after having my baby. So I wear mine that way because I have too. I hope we can still be friends because I am totally with you on the burlap and chevron in particular.

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  76. Not sure how I didn't get around to reading this particular rant yet, but here I am! You know you pretty much broke every blog rule ever - OF COURSE you're supposed to love chevron and burlap and mustaches, I mean come ON, who doesn't?? Did you know, I had to look up what Anthropologie was when I started blogging? And the newest thing seems to be making new stuff look old and crappy and chipped - haven't figured that one out yet. Anyways, I wish we can sit around in our jammies sometime, nursing some trendy drinks and talk about how awesome our husbands are and where to find the latest burlap ruffled headband! To tell the truth, I do occasionally wear a simple band to hold back my new bangs, but it gets pretty ugly, especially when I take it off and look like I was driving 60mph with my head out the window.

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