leaning over toilet as he flushes
Forrest: Bye-bye, pee-pee! I’ll miss you! I wuv you so much!
runs up and hugs me out of the blue
Forrest: Mama, I just wuv you a whole whole whole whole whole whole lot big!
Me: (melts into puddle on floor)
during a brief power outage
Forrest: Uh-oh! The house batteries are dead!
supervising during a diaper change
Forrest: Oh no, Mama! Where is Darcy’s penis?!
Me: She doesn’t have one.
Forrest: Uh-oh, she lose it? Darcy, you lose your penis somewhere? (crouches down, begins searching under dresser, crib, etc. for lost penis)
standing in front of mirror wearing a pajama top tucked into his underpants, a bib turned backwards (cape), and snow boots
Forrest: Whoa, look at that! I look like gooooooood.
Me: What’s going on? Don’t you need to poop?
Forrest: My poopoos are not coming out. They’re just sleeping in there.
Forrest: Mama, what are you making for dinner?
Me: Tuna sandwiches.
Forrest: Ok, wight. But I just have a little secret to tell you. (leans in, whispers in my ear) I don’t like tuna sammiches.
while wandering down the candy aisle at the grocery store
Forrest: Wow, those chocwates look gooooooooood!
Me: Yeah, they do.
Forrest: ‘Member yesterday, I went poopoo in the potty?
Me: Yep, I remember that.
Forrest: I did a willy willy good job!
Me: You sure did.
Forrest: Those chocwates look so so so so yummy.
Forrest: I did a good poopoo. Those chocwates look yummy.
Forrest: I want a treat for my poopoo.
during a dinner of pizza and sweet potato fries
Jeff: Can you finish your sweet potatoes?
Forrest: No, because I am the pizza master.
on a walk, during which Forrest asked roughly 4,000 times if we could walk to the playground
Jeff: If you ask about the playground one more time, we’re going straight back home. Do you understand?
Forrest: Yeah, okay.
(approximately 2 seconds passes)
Forrest: I just want to say somefing.
Jeff: It better not be about the playground.
Forrest: I know. I just want to say, real quick, can we go to the playground?
drapes his blankie over his head like a veil
Forrest: Look, I am a pretty queen! My name is Queen Fowwest.
Me: Hi, Queen Forrest.
Forrest: (shakes my hand) Hi, it’s nice to meet you. I am the queen, so I am in charge now.